Legolas and the Radical Robots
by Legolaaas
Summary: Legolas is on a mission - to save the world from the Radical Robots! *special appearance: aragorn as a hippie and a screwed up car alarm!*
1. Legolaaaaaaa...

Legolas and the Radical Robots  
  
The Radical Robots were advancing. They were getting closer...closer...closer! Their red eyes flashing, arms and legs making a clunky mechanical sound. They drew nearer...until you could see the evil in their eyes! They were out to kill! To murder! To -  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"  
  
Legolas awoke with a start. He sat up and flopped back down, missing his small pillow and hitting his head on the solid mattress. It was the third night in a row he'd had that dream. The dream...the dream about the Radical Robots! It had all started with the sleepover. Legolas had decided to invite the Fellowship over on a sleepover at his place. They'd stayed up really late, watching the entire Star Wars series. Then they'd laughed non- stop as they watched themselves in the Lord of the Rings cartoon movie. Legolas had known he was going to look wierd, but when he finally saw himself as a cartoon, he knew wierd was not the word for it. He'd run to the front of the tv and shielded it until everyone promised not to laugh. It wasn't him who was going to get all the laughs anyways. Boromir had a Viking hat.  
  
But never mind about the details. When the Fellowship turned off the movie, they wanted to watch some TV. That was when the Radical Robots commercial came on. There they were, all in a line, about twenty of them, their evil red eyes flashing. The kids who were playing with them on the commercial looked like they were having fun, but Legolas didn't let that fool him for a second. Those robots were the scariest things he'd ever seen. They were too evil to be real toys for kids. They wanted to take over the world! That was what they really wanted.  
  
It had been 3 nights since that sleepover, and not one of them was spent sleeping peacefully. Legolas had a dream every night that the Radical Robots were out to get the world, and on this night, after waking up from yet another frightening experience, he knew he had to do something. He was going to save the world from the Radical Robots.  
  
Hopping out of bed, Legolas hastily pulled a green cloak over his Big Bird pyjamas and fastened it with a pin that said, "I Survived Doing Sound Effects on Whose Line is it Anyway!" (It was a big pin). There was no time for the unimportant stuff like brushing hair and teeth and putting on shoes. Out the front door the Elf went, and got into his green car. He knew where he had to go first. The factory where they made the Radical Robots.  
  
He would put a stop to it. He would put a stop to it all!  
  
But first, he would go to Dunkin' Donuts and get a coffee. 


	2. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Legolas ran through a red light because he thought it was green. Maybe he was colour-blind. The Fellowship always made someone else drive when going on a long trip, because Legolas thought everything around him was green, including the stop lights.  
  
He narrowly missed a pick-up truck and swerved around the corner towards the Dunkin' Donuts drive-thru. Usually it was busy but this morning no one was there. Legolas pulled right up to the speakers and slammed on the brakes.  
  
"Hello, welcome to Dunkin' Donuts. May I take your order?"  
  
To tell you the truth, Legolas had never been through a drive-thru by himself, and was afraid of the speakers. He thought some little thing was inside them, asking for his order. Same with the stop lights. What made them work? It was like they had a mind of their own.  
  
"Sir? Sir?" the voice said. It sounded flat, dull, almost...mechanical!  
  
"You're a Radical Robot!" he exclaimed. "I know your plans to take over Dunkin Donuts, and I won't let you! You think you're so smart, asking for my order, acting like a worker, but I saw your commercial and I know what you're really up to! I'm going to the factory and I'm going to get rid of all you Radical Robots once and for all!"  
  
Legolas would have laughed evilly but he wasn't evil.  
  
"Sir," the voice said, sounding tired and stressed. "Sir, I have no idea what you're talking about, but may I take your order please? I assure you, I'm not one of those Radical Robots."  
  
Legolas responded by taking his bow and an arrow from the back seat and piercing the speaker.  
  
"One down..."  
  
Adjusting his cloak, Legolas pulled out of the Dunkin' Donuts drive-thru and headed west. He had no idea where in the world the Radical Robots factory was. But he couldn't give up! They were everywhere, taking over Dunkin' Donuts....maybe there was one Radical Robot inside every traffic light! He was surrounded! They knew where he was going...they knew his plan. And they would do anything to stop him. 


	3. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

"Well, here I am!" Legolas said to himself, getting out of his car and slamming the door shut. He forgot to lock the door but that didn't matter. His car was special. If someone tried to break into it, an alarm sounded: a deep voice that said, "BEEP BEEP BEEP. THIS IS A RECORDING. BEEP BEEP BEEP. THIS IS A RECORDING." Legolas had made it himself. The only problem was that it sounded every time he himself tried to turn the car on, and it got embarassing. Anyways, through the Radical Robots parking lot he went in his Big Bird pyjamas, almost getting run over by hippies in a Punchbuggy, eating Dempster's whole grain bread. Legolas could have sworn that underneath the fro and dark sunglasses it was Aragorn, but he shook his head and went on. When Legolas got to the main entrance to the factory he noticed a huge camera watching his every move, just above the doorway. He shot at it with an arrow and heard a voice coming out of it: "Arrows won't work on this kind of camera, Elf." The voice sounded low and scary and deep...like Sarumans. Legolas pushed through the doors and ran through the corridor that followed. At the end of the hall there was a big yellow door that said: "Secret Evil Room". Legolas didn't think that was where he would find the evil robots so he turned to the left and ran down another hall. At the end was a big pink door that said: "Top Secret Really Evil Bad-Guy Residence". Legolas ignored this door also and turned to the right. In front of him was a green door that said "Just your Average Room". He opened the door slowly and peered inside. Two Radical Robots were at a table, talking. They didn't seem to notice Legolas so he just decided to listen right now: "The Elf knows about our plans to take over the world." "Does he know about our weapons?" "Yes." "Does he know we're so evil, we'll kill anything we see in our path?" "I'm sure of it." "Does he know we went undercover as his Fellowship friends?" "We didn't do that!" "Shut up, he's at the door and I want him to think that!" Legolas stepped in and both robots looked up. "We were expecting you," one of the robots said. "you're the only one who knows how evil we really are. And you know we're planning to take over the world...you must die for that!" Legolas ran screaming out of the room, shutting the door behind him. The two robots said, "He'll never tell anyone after this. But...that seemed too easy..." Legolas by now had jumped through an open vent and was climbing through the factory pipes. 


End file.
